Russian state TV has called on Vladimir Putin to order a lethal strike on Britain – in a rant where he even attacked our cuisine.

The dictator’s mouthpiece on state media, Vladimir Solovyov, wants an attack on the production facilities making Storm Shadow missiles, which are mainly in Stevenage.

The demand came after reports Ukraine had deployed Storm Shadow missiles to attack a Black Sea Fleet command facility in Sevastopol, in Putin-annexed Crimea. There were also reports the missiles had been used on the Russian strategic military air base Baltimore in the Voronezh region.

“Every time I read about another [British-made] Storm Shadow missile strike deep into Russia, I genuinely don’t understand why we don’t hit the Storm Shadow factory in the UK,” he demanded.

“What’s the problem? Uh… It’s the UK. So what? What’s so valuable there? What’s so valuable there? Shakespeare’s legacy isn’t tied to an island. What’s so valuable about that Storm Shadow factory?”

Britain was known for “insanely tasteless, disgusting cuisine,” said Solovyov, who despite his hatred chose to educate his children expensively in the UK.

He continued: “What? The corrupt Anglican church? What’s going on there? The people? I feel sorry for the people, so stay away from the Storm Shadow factory.”

Storm Shadow missiles are manufactured by MBDA UK, primarily at Stevenage in Hertfordshire, with additional engineering and production work carried out at MBDA facilities in Bristol and Bolton.

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Storm Shadow itself is a Franco-British weapon, known as SCALP-EG in France.

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