As England prepares for the World Cup, KISS FM DJ Tyler West is backing a powerful campaign about men’s mental health, which encourages pre kick-off chats and check-ins with the boys.
It’s an initiative the 30-year-old – who knows what it’s like to hit rock bottom mentally – believes could ‘save lives’, as male suicide rates in the capital reach a six-year high.
“I know first hand about feeling like I didn’t want to be here any more. Thankfully, I’m one of those who came out the other side.”
View 7 ImagesTalk & Tats encourages men to have a chat about anything they’re struggling with pre-match
West was just 14 when he witnessed a man wielding a 12-inch blade stab another to death, from the window of his family home, on the tough St Helier council estate in south London.
The then-teen watched as the attackers fled into a nearby flat while he and his mother Debbie, an NHS nurse, rushed outside to help the fatally wounded man, who tragically died in a puddle of blood.
It was a deeply traumatic event for West, triggering years of severe mental health struggles.
He became a recluse, developed severe OCD and even struggled with simple tasks, such as using a knife and fork at dinner. Three years later, aged 17, he even contemplated suicide, as he stood on a bridge over a motorway in the middle of the night.
He says, “When that happened, it didn’t just affect the two people involved – the person holding the knife, and the victim. It had a ripple effect on the entire community, on anybody that witnessed it, or felt unsafe in that area.
“For me, at that age? I couldn’t quite put it all into words. I struggled so much. I just wanted to bury it, entirely. I didn’t leave my bedroom for two years.”
The vulnerable 14-year-old was also required to publicly give evidence at the Old Bailey as a key witness, something which he later revealed ‘terrified’ him, as he worried that he’d be recognised.
7View 7 ImagesTyler proposed to Molly in Mykonos last August(Image: Social Media)
7View 7 ImagesThey recently ticked off the London Landmarks half marathon together(Image: Jordan Peck|Getty Images)
Years on as an adult, he admits to a certain amount of anger that as a child, he was exposed to such graphic details in a courtroom.
But his own devastating experiences have spurred him on to help others – and most recently, West has teamed up with London Designer Outlet and men’s mental fitness charity Talk Club, to front a campaign aimed at getting London’s men talking.
His involvement included a pre-match Talk & Tatts day at Wembley Stadium recently, chatting to men about football, tattoos – and anything they might be struggling with.
He says, “It was incredible. Basically, a match-day meet-up became this safe space where we can check in with the lads, and say, “Look, how are you out of 10?”
It’s made Tyler more aware of checking in with his own circle of mates, too. “Later that day, I went to my boys’ group chat and said, Boys, let’s catch up.”
One individual who stuck with Tyler was a father of two, who he chatted to briefly with his sons, before the man returned on his own.
“He said, ‘You know what, Tyler, I’m actually not OK right now. My finances aren’t good, but I put on a brave face for my kids. It’s just so hard.’
“More often than not, that person in the street is going through something. To have the courage to speak out – that’s something we should normalise.”
The campaign offers some devastating figures. Men account for 73% of suicides in London, and the male suicide rate in the capital is at an all-time high.
7View 7 ImagesThe KISS FM DJ first met Molly while doing Strictly in 2022 with pro Dianne Buswell(Image: BBC/Ray Burmiston)
7View 7 ImagesMolly was partnered with future champ, Carlos Gu(Image: BBC/Guy Levy)
Tyler admits the figures are “shattering”. “Things are changing, but men have often been taught from such a young age that we need to mask our emotions, not talk about it. But it gets to the point where it’s unbearable. And that’s dangerous.”
As for West, who is engaged to former EastEnders star Molly Rainford, with whom he took on gruelling BBC reality show Celebrity Race Across the World last year, he says it was starting a sport that first put him on the path to recovery.
“I started playing sport, and that was a stepping stone. I thought, ‘OK, I’m doing sport now, my mind’s not thinking about it for a minute.’
“That helped me get my mental strength back. It allowed me to be like, ‘Maybe I do need to open up, or try other forms of therapy.’ It was the beginning of a long process.”
Despite how dark things became, the broadcaster also believes everything happens for a reason, even the earth-shattering moment he witnessed as a teen.
He explains, “If I hadn’t witnessed that murder that day, I wouldn’t have been indoors for two years, and wouldn’t have found the things that eventually helped me.
“If my teachers hadn’t got me into handball, I wouldn’t have got selected for the England squad. And I wouldn’t have been spotted by CBBC producers, who came to film us, and then try out TV presenting.
View 7 ImagesTyler and Molly are planning their Big Day – and sharing it all on new The Pre-Nup podcast(Image: Ben Whitley/PA Wire)
“I wouldn’t have Molly, or be able to support my lovely mum like I can. The tough times I went through were the catalyst and honestly, they are my biggest motivation.”
Tyler’s advice for anyone who might be struggling? “Don’t be stubborn and closed off, like I was when I was younger. There’s so much help around – be it online, in person or yes, even getting down to the football and having a chat with your mates.”
Today, West has not only emerged from the darkest chapter of his life, his future is looking brighter than ever.
Up early every weekday alongside Chloe Burrows to co-host the breakfast show on Kiss FM, he’s also planning his wedding with Molly, and the loved-up pair launch their new podcast The Pre-Nup on 11 June.
“Getting married is hard!”, he laughs. “But it’s about us having those conversations unfiltered. Wedding planning is a full-time job.”
The presenter, who met his other half on Strictly in 2022, admits there was a time he’d never have imagined his life panning out this way.
“I do get imposter syndrome. Growing up, I was like, people that look like me, sound like me, from the area that I’ve been from, who have gone through the things that I’ve been through, shouldn’t be in these positions. But I am – and I’m very happy, and grateful.”
For more info on Talk & Tatts, follow LDO’s social channels (IG: @londondesigneroutlet, TikTok: @ldowembleypark). For Talk & Listen groups, visit talkclub.org
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