Most of us likely haven’t given much consideration to the titles we use, simply selecting them when filling in forms or placing orders online. Yet many of these carry deeper significance when examined more closely, particularly regarding feminine titles.
While men consistently use Mr irrespective of their marital status, women’s titles can alter depending on this factor – Miss for an unmarried woman and Mrs for someone who is married. There is, however, a third alternative, Ms, which can be adopted by women regardless of their marital status.
Though it’s certainly less prevalent than Miss or Mrs, Ms remains widely used by many women, and is frequently a matter of personal preference.
Miss is conventionally used exclusively by unmarried women, while Ms is employed by women irrespective of marital status. The traditional titles, Miss and Mrs, were considered by some to be rather sexist, as they define a woman according to her marital status.
Ms, conversely, does not indicate any marital status. It has, however, faced criticism from some for “not standing for anything.”
View 2 ImagesMrs or Miss typically denote a woman’s marital status(Image: Getty)
This argument has been challenged by historian Dr Amy Erickson, who has researched the origins of Mrs, Miss and Ms. She said: “It’s curious that the use of Ms is often criticised today as not ‘standing for’ anything. In fact, it has an impeccable historical pedigree since it was one of several abbreviations for Mistress in the 17th and 18th centuries.”
Mrs, Miss and Ms are all abbreviations of the word ‘Mistress’, while Mr is an abbreviation of ‘Master. ‘ However, although Miss and Mrs denote marital status today, this wasn’t always the case.
The title ‘Miss’ was only adopted by adult women for the first time in the mid-18th century, prior to which it had only been used for girls, while women would typically be referred to as ‘Mrs’, regardless of their marital status.
Even then, these titles weren’t used by all women, and Dr Erickson explains: “Until the 19th century, most women did not have any prefix before their name. Mrs and, later, Miss were both restricted to those of higher social standing. Women on the bottom rungs of the social scale were addressed simply by their names.
“Thus, in a large household the housekeeper might be Mrs Green, while the scullery maid was simply Molly and the woman who came in to do the laundry was Tom Black’s wife or Betty Black.”
Back in 2017, the BBC spoke to a number of women who go by Ms, rather than Mrs or Miss, to find out the reasoning behind their choice. Helen Hall, 51, from Scarborough, said: “I started to use Ms for two reasons. Beyond the age of 25, Miss feels rather undignified. Also, I began to resent having to reveal my marital status.
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“When organisations see me listed as Ms, they always call me Mrs Hall. I don’t correct them, as I don’t want to make a big deal of it. I dealt face-to-face with customers for 15 years, and when taking details from a woman, I would always ask, ‘Which title do you prefer?’ Simple.”
Meanwhile, Jennie Jonasson, 51, from Montreal, Canada, said: “I go by Ms. When my husband and I received an invoice addressed to Mr and Mrs, I sent it back with the Mr and Mrs scratched out and wrote: ‘Mr [husband’s surname] and Ms Jonasson’. Mrs and Miss to me are dinosaur terms that belong in the Downton Abbey era!”.