While uncovering your family history can be a captivating experience, it can also bring to light truths you’d sooner have left buried. That’s precisely what one woman found out after purchasing a DNA test on a whim – only to sever ties with her mother shortly afterwards.
Speaking on her behalf, her uncle cautioned: “I know that everyone is curious about their genealogy and it seems a harmless, and could be useful in the case of genetic health issues, test – but it’s also important to remember that DNA testing can unearth family secrets that it serves no one to unearth. I saw this in my family when a niece did a 23andMe and found out her father was not her bio-father.”
He went on to reveal that his sister had made a conscious choice to end an affair decades earlier, as she wanted her children to be raised in a stable and secure home.
He added: “She had no idea that she was pregnant with the other person’s child. She was deeply in love with the man, but refused to break up the marriage over it.”
Yet 45 years on, his niece stumbled upon the truth through a DNA test.
“Mum was in shock at first, but told the daughter that she would tell her anything she wanted to know and encouraged her to reach out to this man,” he said.
“The father who raised her, and was a great dad, had passed away 20 years before. Unfortunately, the bio-dad had become an alcoholic and died shortly after they connected.
“The daughter has now cut the mother off and hasn’t spoken to her in five years. The mother is heartbroken, but understands her daughter’s anger and has said: ‘I have it coming… it’s my punishment.’
“She is 73 now and this was her only child.”
Issuing a stark warning, he urged people to think long and hard before taking DNA tests, as the results can uncover life-altering revelations.
He said: “It’s one thing if it’s for a genetic or health reason and you need to understand your family medical history. But maybe some secrets just need to stay secret.
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“My sister will never be the same. She’s elderly now and has lost the people she loved most through her own fault, as she sees it. But I have to remind her that she’s human, and humans make mistakes.
“At this point, it makes little difference. Just think carefully if you get a result back that is shocking, surprising or not what you expected. There can be far more at stake than your curiosity.”